“bad idea,” part 2

[sophiaserpentia]

Originally published at Monstrous Regiment. You can comment here or there.

Last week i wrote a long post in response to the online posting of an essay by Dr. Paul McHugh of Johns Hopkins. Then yesterday i encountered again the idea of ‘autogynephilia’ among transsexual women, this time in the context of J. Michael Bailey’s work.

Yes, THAT J. Michael Bailey. A number of people far more capable, connected, and knowledgeable than i have undertaken the task of demonstrating the holes, shortcuts, and ethical breaches in Bailey’s research, so i’m going to take a different tack — to explore the subtext and presumption behind this controversy.

When i wrote that post my reaction was fueled by indignation at seeing my life and experiences, and those of many people i care about, reduced to something immoral and pathological. But my reaction assumes the same moralistic paradigm. To respond properly, i need to take that paradigm head-on because i believe that moralism and respectability were self-servingly constructed in order to suppress dissent and oppress minorities. Indeed, we gallae know this well; the iconic story of our life is to have fingers pointed at us in accusation by the very same men who accepted our favors the night before. We, being visible, cannot hide behind the notion of respectability which allows people of privilege to hide from accountability for their deeds.

‘Autogynephilia’ is a model promoted by Ray Blanchard, who coined the term; Michael Bailey, who promoted it; and Anne Lawrence, a post-op TS who lends legitimacy and the weight of further research. The word was defined by Ray Blanchard as “a man’s paraphilic tendency to be sexually aroused by the thought or image of himself as a woman.”

Look at that definition. The real meaning, which all but literally drips from this statement, is, essentially, “They’re being naughty.” And furthermore, the arguments made by Blanchard, Bailey, Lawrence, McHugh, et al., is that sex-reassignment therapy is a misuse of the medical profession’s sway over the public to promote naughtiness; that transsexual women (where are the transmen in all of this? nonexistent of course) cause psychiatrists and surgeons to be unwitting participants in the acting out of their sexual fantasy.

It’s a funny thing, arousal. In my time, i’ve toyed with the idea that arousal is one of the body’s ways of telling us that something is good or right. I can lay beside my partner, or walk down the street holding her hand, and feel my flesh get warm and tingly, you know, down there; i’ve even heard that women sometimes feel arousal when breastfeeding their child. Affection and breastfeeding are good, and if they should be accompanied by arousal, why should we conclude that there is suddenly something immoral going on? Why shouldn’t the body be able to respond positively to encourage us to seek more of something, when after all, the body is also capable of reacting with physical repulsion or sickness?

This doesn’t mean that arousal is always good or right. But maybe, even just sometimes, it can be a reflection that we are doing something right.

Furthermore, and here’s the point i am really heading towards: even if some or most of us do happen to be aroused at some point in conjunction with of our transition, it does not necessarily follow that transition is therefore invalid, or improper, or unhealthy. It does not mean we are lying when we say it is what we need.

I find particularly moving this essay by Margaret McGhee, who was a participant in a now-defunct online autogynephilia support group. I was going to quote from it, but i’d rather anyone interested just read the essay.

She arrived a conclusion not unlike my own, that gallae live our lives adrift at sea, tossed this way and that by competing ideologies and narratives that silence us and re-write our lives in their image. There is not a single paradigm for answering the “transsexual problem,” but there are instead numerous competing narratives. If we live our lives in resonance with one, we run afoul of another; there is no way to win. In the spaces between competing paradigms, our lives, our bodies, our minds, even our sexual favors, are bargaining chips.

An underlying implication of this conflict is that gallae are not allowed to be aroused. This is a running theme: it is a likely reaction to medicines and surgery; it is a prominent theme in many a galla’s sex life and is often found in galla-objectifying pornography; and then we see moralistic, pathologizing condemnation like this if it does occur. Sexual arousal is the prerogative of the ruling class.

Comments

[trypheanoia.livejournal.com]

I have toyed with the idea that transexuality is really the stuff of mysteries, and has its basis on a deep spiritual level.

The liturgy for such mysteries would be pretty cool. I imagine that it would involve all kids of chrysalis imagery.

Totally unrelated, I know, but I was tossing it around inside my head, and I didn't have anything to say to your very interesting post other than, "boo people that suck!"

[sophiaserpentia.livejournal.com]

I used to think that caterpillars and butterflies were a good metaphor for transsexual transition. Now that i'm in the middle of it i don't really think that way anymore.

The thing is, where i am right now, mid-transition, doesn't feel like being in a chrysalis. I'm not closed off, cocooned, semi-un-alive. Transition takes years, and it's not a process of emerging into the world all at once completely changed from man into woman. I'm learning every day something new about what this course i've taken really means.

To me, it feels more like winter turning to spring, or night turning to day, or a blossom slowly opening.

[sarahmichigan.livejournal.com]

I just think it's ridiculous and sad that people take this guy so seriously and that you have to defend yourself against this kind of thinking.

*shakes head*

[sophiaserpentia.livejournal.com]

He's his own worst enemy.

I think there are a lot of parallels between the size-acceptance movement and transactivism, because we have to deal so much with the medical community pathologizing us based on statistical norms and stereotypes, unable to deal with individual circumstances or variance.

[akaiyume.livejournal.com]

Doesn't a more positive body image translate to higher levels of sexual arousal in general? I'm sure degree varies by individuals, but really, I fail to see how trans people being more aroused when thinking of a body they are more comfortable in is a problem.

[sophiaserpentia.livejournal.com]

Yeah, i think you see it the way i do. When a person is happier, or can imagine a situation in which they would be happier, they are more likely to be aroused. And that could be what is fundamentally going on here.

This idea of autogynephilia is essentially saying that there is a filthy kind of pushbutton causality in transwomen's arousal. It's deeply rooted in authoritarian moralism. Heck, the medical community spends many millions of dollars finding ways to help men become aroused. But OUR arousal is not allowed.

[akaiyume.livejournal.com]

Yes... isn't it very strange how arousal (or at least arousal not mean to serve someone higher in the privilege structure) is more "moral" the closer one is to the top of the power pyramid.

[kyeli-unlikely.livejournal.com]

It’s a funny thing, arousal. In my time, i’ve toyed with the idea that arousal is one of the body’s ways of telling us that something is good or right. I can lay beside my partner, or walk down the street holding her hand, and feel my flesh get warm and tingly, you know, down there; i’ve even heard that women sometimes feel arousal when breastfeeding their child. Affection and breastfeeding are good, and if they should be accompanied by arousal, why should we conclude that there is suddenly something immoral going on? Why shouldn’t the body be able to respond positively to encourage us to seek more of something, when after all, the body is also capable of reacting with physical repulsion or sickness?

This really opens a door for me. I have many thoughts, changing thoughts. Woot! Change is afoot! (:

[sophiaserpentia.livejournal.com]

:-D

Thank You again for Blowing My Mind...

[merlot-winters.livejournal.com]

i think you're on to something there with your discussion of the 'privilege of arousal'.

What do you make of the research connecting dissociative disorders (sorry to have to use that word) with transgenderism? Personally, i wonder a lot, because sometimes i feel female, and sometimes i feel male, and other times i feel like something altogether different- more alien than terrestrial. Maybe it's just because i'm an air sign. i recall a conversation i had with an old professor several months ago where i was talking about transgender people in history and other cultures, and i recall wishing that our society had a third gender so i would not feel compelled to identify as one or the other.

One thing i can say is that i have always been a very sensitive person and my transition has been a boon as far as giving myself permission to express myself fully. Another thing i can say is that i am much more comfortable being female bodied (even if i don't have a classicly female shape).

Do you think readjustment of our hormones changes our behavior in the long-term? It's been eight years of living with a new hormonal mix and though my libido is much lower i feel much more satisfied after sex. My typing speed improved but that could also be from my professional choices as well. i really don't feel that different in my brain though i think most of the changes i've experienced have been social - being more invisible, being taken less seriously, being the object of ridicule and innuendo, being isolated, being hypervigilant to the point of paranoia.

i think of my own role now more than ever in terms of being on a shamanic path - of public service to the community while living slightly outside of the community.

Re: Thank You again for Blowing My Mind...

[sophiaserpentia.livejournal.com]

What do you make of the research connecting dissociative disorders (sorry to have to use that word) with transgenderism?

Got any links? Just anecdotally, as someone who has known many transpeople and many people with dissociative issues (and being in both classes myself), i would not be surprised at all to find such a link established clinically. Dissociation is a common response to extreme childhood trauma, and transpeople are highly likely to be extremely traumatized.

It will be interesting to see, now that the medical model is shifting towards supporting transition before puberty and coaching parents and community to be more accepting and compassionate, if this link still holds for the generation now growing up.

There's a lot here for me to mull over in what you've written, i'll have to come back to your thoughts.

references - dissociative and transgender

[merlot-winters.livejournal.com]

http://www.symposion.com/ijt/greenpresidental/green08.htm

http://www.tradingmysorrows.com/

http://www.symposion.com/ijt/ijtc0404.htm

the second one is a person who claims to have dissociative disorder but thought is was transgenderism.

Re: references - dissociative and transgender

[cigfran-lwyd.livejournal.com]

that second link is quite a testimony to confusion and blaming.
what a distasteful, sad wreck.

Re: references - dissociative and transgender

[merlot-winters.livejournal.com]

yeah, you gotta wonder when that phase is gonna run its course. Then we'll have a trans version of these cats who were in charge of Exodus ministries who speak out against it.