a few non-exhaustive words about privilege

[sophiaserpentia]

A friend pointed me to this list of privilege the other day. Quoting bits which are relevant to frequent discussion in this journal:

privilege is consistently responding to disagreement, criticism, and concerns with condescension and hostility, then accusing the unprivileged of being irrational, inconsistent, duplicitous, guileful, and unappeasable

privilege is feeling entitled to the conformity in behaviours and attitudes of the unprivileged

privilege is not having to be self-conscious and self-critical

privilege is the habit of seeking power and influence over others

the privileged sees power over others as success

privilege is the ability to start, end, and avoid discussion with little consequence

privilege is shelter from direct consequences

privilege is feeling entitled to be better off than others

I want to add a few of my own:

Privilege means not having to wonder, ever, if people around you are regularly putting your needs ahead of theirs.

Privilege means being able to laugh at certain kinds of joke instead of being aware of your inferiority.

Privilege means not having to worry about the effects of your words or actions.

Edit. It was correctly pointed out that this list reflects the automatic assumption or perhaps assertion-by-default of privilege.

Comments

[sophiaserpentia.livejournal.com]

Some humor has malice, some does not. It's not always easy to tell the difference, especially if you're not the target of it.

[griffen.livejournal.com]

I've been the target of racist jokes (Irish, Scottish, English, Mexican - due to my past marriage to someone who was ethnically Hispanic), religious jokes (pagan and Catholic), sexist jokes (as I was born female), gay jokes and trans jokes. Most of them were told by people who were of the same ethnicity, religion, etc. as the targets. My late father-in-law was 100% Mexican-American, and he collected what he called "beaner" jokes. He thought they were hysterical.

I do not agree with your contention, and it bothers me that you'd rather focus on the oppression or supposed malice than on the humor. It makes me wonder if you've ever laughed at yourself, or allowed yourself to be the target of a joke without feeling enraged or oppressed.

[sophiaserpentia.livejournal.com]

What do you want me to say? Sometimes humor is malicious, sometimes it is not. Do you feel that humor is never malicious?

[griffen.livejournal.com]

Most humor, in order to be malicious, has to be intentionally so. I don't think the groups of people who make jokes you would consider malicious to be intrisincally malicious people. And I believe in giving people the benefit of the doubt unless there is other overt evidence of malice.

[sophiaserpentia.livejournal.com]

I see your point. I tend to analyze based on action; to me, malice and hatred are descriptive of actions and motives, not perceived feelings. People are not always aware of their own motives or feelings, my theory being that we are in some ways blinkered from seeing our own participation in patterns of hate.

IMO telling someone that they "just can't take a joke" is evidence of malice; it is very belittling and means that the target's sensibilities are not worthy of consideration.

[griffen.livejournal.com]

I tend to analyze based on motive, or idea. Action comes from motive and motive comes from ideas. If a person don't have the demonstrated intent to be malicious, it is important to give the benefit of the doubt.

[griffen.livejournal.com]

And I would agree with you that saying "you can't take a joke" is a slight indicator of malice. It's still only a slight one, however. Not all indicators have the same amount of strength. A person making an ethnic joke who gets embarrassed when challenged on it is not, IMO, the same as a person who publishes a book of ethnic jokes and says "They can't take a joke, can they? Humorless twits!" about people who object to one or two of the jokes in it, nor is it the same as a person who makes egregiously, overtly, and maliciously racist statements in addition to telling racist jokes.