(no subject)

[sophiaserpentia]

This essay about "New Age Bullying" has been making the rounds on my friend's list for a couple of days now.

I think the author of this list left out the most significant form of new age bullying i've seen: where people tell you to "not let your pain control you."

There's a point in the healing process where you can finally do this. I've experienced it myself -- one day, the pain just doesn't overwhelm you anymore and you wonder how it could ever have controlled you the way it did.

Well, it happens that way because there is so separation between body and mind. An emotional or psychological injury affects the way your nerve cells communicate with one another and the ways your nerve cells react to neuropeptides and neurotransmitters. It takes time to fix this. Recovering from trauma is very much like healing a physical cut. And some injuries of this sort are too deep and big to heal in the space of a single lifetime.

So, while some people find they suddenly have the ability to own their hurt and not be controlled by it anymore, it is wrong for them to then turn around to people who haven't healed yet and demand they snap out of it. To do so is more injurious than simply listening and offering compassion while someone is still healing.

But the article also made me realize i can't hide anymore how much contempt i have developed for almost all spirituality. Every now and then i come across something which is genuinely healing, but most commonly what i see is emotional manipulation, collections of platitudes meant to make us feel better about injustice.

What if people stopped believing there was a big daddy-figure in the sky who was going to punish all the bad guys after they die, a Santa Claus type figure watching everything that happens and keeping a list of everyone who's good and everyone who's bad? Maybe people shouldn't find comfort in this idea. Even if it's true. Because maybe then they would be more moved to seek justice in this life.

Comments

[circuit-four.livejournal.com]

I feel differently than you do about spirituality -- and the prospect of talking with you about why someday sounds entirely appealing. But this is still a great post and I think what you said about the physiology of trauma deserves to be repeated. Mind if I link to this?

[sophiaserpentia.livejournal.com]

I don't mind. :)

Longtime readers of this blog can track my progress over the last four years from bright-eyed optimistic researcher of the occult into the crotchety grouchy ol' cynic i am today.

WRT the proportion of genuinely-healing spirituality to emotionally-manipulative pseudo-spirittuality, maybe i'm wrong about the actual ratio. I'd be happy if i learned that the latter is actually much less common than it seems to me right now.

[stacymckenna.livejournal.com]

the crotchety grouchy ol' cynic i am today

Bah! You just haven't settled yet. You sound more like the dubious "my parent's generation can't be right about this - it all feels wrong!" teenager to me, regardless of your age. When you find a philosophy that "fits", you'll cease to come off as "cynical". I still see a great deal of spirituality in your writing, even if it doesn't follow any particular dogma or creed. And that's usually the best kind. :)

[sophiaserpentia.livejournal.com]

Hmm, there's not that many philosophies left for me to try on. And even philosophies i agree with, like UUism, i find have significant shortcomings in practice. So... the philosophy i settle into may actually be grouchiness.

[stacymckenna.livejournal.com]

::giggle::

fair enough!

[circuit-four.livejournal.com]

Yeah, whatever differences of opinion we may have, I can't claim you didn't come by them honestly. :) Besides, most self-identified "spiritual" people would probably deny that my mishmosh of psychedelia, depth psychology, madhyamika, and memetics is "real spirituality" anyhow...

That, incidentally, brings up my only real counterpoint. I think your frustration towards spirituality, especially organized religion, is totally valid. But personally, I see it as "bad" the same way shellfish was "bad" to the Hebrews -- they're good food in their own right (if you're carnivorous), but without modern hygenic functions, the little bastards are breeding farms for disease.

Much the same with spirituality. There are many things about the topic that make it very hospitable for bad ideas, bad thinking habits that are native to human brains but not incorrectible. There's nothing necessarily wrong with a typical spiritual system at its foundation -- the damn things just spoil really fast in an ignorance-rich environment like ours...

But I'm probably preaching to the ex-choir here. :)