I could rant forever about the ways some people try to pervert BDSM but I would be preaching to the choir. i don't know where 'i' begin and the colonization stops -- or even if that distinction is meaningful.
Well, in someways colonization is part of the enviornment, so to that extent, to the way that being influences/is influenced by the enviornment in a continuous circle then they will inform desires.
I really haven't thought of it all too much. So here is your warning. I have no idea if the long rambly thing below is even connected to what you are thinking about, may be ground that you have been over, or if it even makes sense. Read the rambling stuff below at dire threat to your own non-boredom.
But... I think sexual desires - especially the more and more it gets into the realm of being a fantasy - is more than about a concerete "what". It is more like a picture/tactile/sensory/emotive way of the brain telling us what sensations have meaning to us, and telling us perhaps what other needs that may address.
Taking the last paragraph of what you have linked to (and having that interplay with thoughts I have had that are vaguely related but could be applied) what you are saying is that the further you are able to go into that fantasy in the real world depends on having found certain qualities that are connected to the fantasy but aren't really SEXUAL feelings, and these are things that you want to feel/give. As in you sensibly only go so far, but you fantasize about more because what you WANT is what makes those acts possible. And doing those acts to the degree you have the non-tangibles that are connected with doing them is a very potent way of communicating to deep parts of yourself that you have found those things. Because even if you have found them, some part of you may only really understand it in those terms.
There "intuitive" or "emotional" parts of the brain react much more strongly to more sensory symbols than words symbols. And what is fantasy (whether in imagination or real life) but a living out of a full-blown sensorama metaphor that our brain creates. So fantasy are our brains way in part of telling us what we want but more so telling us how we can really *feel* those things we want once we find them. They are the brains way of telling us the "language" it considers its mother tongue in certain situations.
It seems that the dangercomes if we use fantasy as a way to GAIN what we want (in other words, we should EXAMINE or fantasies to see if feelings other than purely physical happen in them). Like if approval (probably a need that shapes a lot of the sexual desires that get labelled colonized) and the feelings of were entwined in the sexual fantasy, then that (ie, the approval) should be there first before it is acted on. Because the fantasy doesn't get us anything from other particiapants but the physical aspects - and sometimes that is okay, sometimes that is hurtful spiritually and emotionally if the thing the act communicates to the deeper parts of the brain is absent from the act that communicates it, or if the act involves physical danger and the person we do it with is unworthy of the trust, then physical damages could happen. It is just a way to really feel it, to rev up the emotions, to present the world in a way the emotional self can really feel when what it wants is there.
So it is very possible that a disempowering reality can cause certain desires. I mean, some fantasies (and I think a substantial amount of sub-type fantasy comes from this) comes from recreating a situation that was made harmful by the lack of certain elements ( ones that we may not think about as being there if they are not concrete, because most people don't think about what is NOT present as being a function of what is present anyway, but the part of the brain that makes intuitive connections does) and making a sensually similar atmosphere where those elements are present. Perhaps in interpreting our fantasies we only think about the "concrete" because that is what we have been taught to focus on when the way it makes us feel (in additon to horny) and things like that are just as important a part.
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2007-01-30 09:06 am (UTC)i don't know where 'i' begin and the colonization stops -- or even if that distinction is meaningful.
Well, in someways colonization is part of the enviornment, so to that extent, to the way that being influences/is influenced by the enviornment in a continuous circle then they will inform desires.
I really haven't thought of it all too much. So here is your warning. I have no idea if the long rambly thing below is even connected to what you are thinking about, may be ground that you have been over, or if it even makes sense. Read the rambling stuff below at dire threat to your own non-boredom.
But... I think sexual desires - especially the more and more it gets into the realm of being a fantasy - is more than about a concerete "what". It is more like a picture/tactile/sensory/emotive way of the brain telling us what sensations have meaning to us, and telling us perhaps what other needs that may address.
Taking the last paragraph of what you have linked to (and having that interplay with thoughts I have had that are vaguely related but could be applied) what you are saying is that the further you are able to go into that fantasy in the real world depends on having found certain qualities that are connected to the fantasy but aren't really SEXUAL feelings, and these are things that you want to feel/give. As in you sensibly only go so far, but you fantasize about more because what you WANT is what makes those acts possible. And doing those acts to the degree you have the non-tangibles that are connected with doing them is a very potent way of communicating to deep parts of yourself that you have found those things. Because even if you have found them, some part of you may only really understand it in those terms.
There "intuitive" or "emotional" parts of the brain react much more strongly to more sensory symbols than words symbols. And what is fantasy (whether in imagination or real life) but a living out of a full-blown sensorama metaphor that our brain creates. So fantasy are our brains way in part of telling us what we want but more so telling us how we can really *feel* those things we want once we find them. They are the brains way of telling us the "language" it considers its mother tongue in certain situations.
It seems that the dangercomes if we use fantasy as a way to GAIN what we want (in other words, we should EXAMINE or fantasies to see if feelings other than purely physical happen in them). Like if approval (probably a need that shapes a lot of the sexual desires that get labelled colonized) and the feelings of were entwined in the sexual fantasy, then that (ie, the approval) should be there first before it is acted on. Because the fantasy doesn't get us anything from other particiapants but the physical aspects - and sometimes that is okay, sometimes that is hurtful spiritually and emotionally if the thing the act communicates to the deeper parts of the brain is absent from the act that communicates it, or if the act involves physical danger and the person we do it with is unworthy of the trust, then physical damages could happen. It is just a way to really feel it, to rev up the emotions, to present the world in a way the emotional self can really feel when what it wants is there.
So it is very possible that a disempowering reality can cause certain desires. I mean, some fantasies (and I think a substantial amount of sub-type fantasy comes from this) comes from recreating a situation that was made harmful by the lack of certain elements ( ones that we may not think about as being there if they are not concrete, because most people don't think about what is NOT present as being a function of what is present anyway, but the part of the brain that makes intuitive connections does) and making a sensually similar atmosphere where those elements are present. Perhaps in interpreting our fantasies we only think about the "concrete" because that is what we have been taught to focus on when the way it makes us feel (in additon to horny) and things like that are just as important a part.