sophiaserpentia | (no subject)

(no subject)

I think the reason I have been largely silent here in the last year or so is because I have taken to thinking it would be a great comfort to pass through this world as insubstantially as a ghost; passing through it, observing, listening, and then moving on unmourned, unremarked-upon, unremembered. It occurs to me, belatedly but not too much so, that perhaps this is a conceit.

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Too late.

Just settle for being memorably obnoxious.

It's not my style to be obnoxious, though. Or so I think -- maybe I actually am obnoxious and everyone thinks I am but meanwhile here I am, thinking I'm being as unoffensive and quiet as I can possibly be. I honestly have no idea where the threshold is, or how accurate my image of myself actually is. The small glimpses I have indicate that I seem to have a very skewed and deluded perception of who and what I am, and it scares me to think about that.

Stop being unoffensive and quiet.

But I just got comfy in my hermitage.

lawl

Being a hermit is portrayed as this thing that saints and holy figures do -- but I wonder if the reality isn't that people who's sayings and doings get twisted into religions are usually just painfully sensitive and spend large parts of their life staying away from people so they can't hurt them or be hurt by them.

Martin Luther did that.

Yeah, and look what happened to him. No influence or memory of him to be found anywhere.

I know, it's terrible! The absolute worst thing I can imagine is for things I say and do to be twisted into a worldwide religion. What a nightmare. How awful.

Well, okay, it's not the absolute worst thing I can imagine. But for the sake of hyperbole in this context it is. ;)

Edited 2010-02-19 16:59 (UTC)

FWIW, I don't think of you as obnoxious. But then maybe that's because I'm obnoxious. :)

FWIW, I don't think of *you* as obnoxious.

I've never found you to be obnoxious. But then, I also tend to hermitage in fear of coming across as obnoxious. In fact, my tendency to hermit is strongest after someone vehemently, or even just strongly, opposes something I've said or done, because my first assumption is that I've been offensive. I can entirely see where hermits might be those who are "painfully sensitive".

Invisibility is tempting. With the kid around now, it's VERY tempting - the last thing you want to be is *those* parents/*that* family/*that* kid.

My self-perception doesn't seem to line up with anyone else's perception of me, either. I think it's a pretty universal human trait.

reclusiveness is addictive. srsly. :-P

you won't leave this world un-mourned.

and if you leave before i get to hug you, i'll find you and kick your butt.

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